Shoelace a Heismaniac? Tide vs. Ducks? If Were a Sportswriter
Which I’m not… but give me a call if you need one
By Joe Bodolai (c) 2010, All rights reserved
There is no reason for this to be a new paragraph since the last one was just random ranting sentences so, what the hell: Michigan is more fun to watch than Darryl Hannah’s death scene in Blade Runner — lots of fantastic orgasmic thrashing around before the batteries run out. (Oh, if you don’t remember, she played a “pleasure robot”, which is what Rich Rodriguez calls Denard Robinson.) Michigan’s offense will score faster than The Situation in a bar full of drunk Jersey cougars. Michigan’s defense has officially become an oxymoron, emphasis on “moron”, apparently meaning Greg Robinson, their defensive “coordinator”. Robinson’s strategy of keeping the defense on the field as little as possible would be a great idea if they remembered to use the scheme called “three and out” instead of “four play scoring drive.” That’s what I’d call anyway, since Robinson seems to confuse football with golf. In football, lower score loses. Indiana’s odometer cycled up something like 700 yards, which should hold them for another five years. After all, Indiana rolled up only like 300 on the Maginot Line known as Cornhole State, or whomever they played the week before.
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