New Gap Logo Spawns Massive Collective Lameass Insight
Internet Insight
By Joe Bodolai © 2010, All rights reserved
Clothing retailer The Gap revealed their new logo this week, an expensive bullshit-baffles-brains consultant fleecing by the jargon merchants at Laird & Partners of New York. Internet marketing analyst Some Guy on a Computer in Starbucks immediately termed the logo “Crap”, apparently playing on the rhyme with the store name. It was a matter of .026 seconds before a Google search turned up “about 18,800,000 results for your search” for “new gap logo crap”. Rival blogger Dude at Peet’s likened the massive outpouring of collective insight as “like Leibniz and Newton inventing calculus independently of each other, but without all the math and shit.”
After paying Laird and Partners an undisclosed ungodly sum, the Gap immediately took remedial action by asking viewers of their Facebook page to submit new designs for free. The grade ten computer class at Tie Domi High School in Downsview, Ontario, was assigned the project of replicating the logo, finishing it in four minutes and spending an estimated $1.45 (Cdn) in printer ink. Say it Ain’t So, Joe! immediately issued a formal apology for the previous sentence, admitting “it’s pretty much the same simple-minded thing I lamented in the other paragraphs but I needed a punchline,” explained Joe. “I’m asking readers to send in their suggestions and help me make this post not only more intelligently insightful but also funnier. Of course, I want this for free. I’ll probably get some ‘interns’ on craigslist. I can’t give credit or meals, but they will get exposure. They must have iMDB credits and screenplays produced, of course.”
