Snooki: The Oil Slick in the Hot Tub
It’s Over” — Nostradamus
By Joe Bodolai (c) 2011, All rights reserved
A week or so ago, I happened by the Barnes and Noble store at the Grove in Los Angeles, a faux urban streetscape of a mall, to find a huge queue to attend the bookstore’s “
moving your lips while reading series.” The author that evening was none other than the Jane Austen of The Hot Tub herself, Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi. The crowd was there to hear her first-person author’s insights about her hairball of keystrokage by a poor ghost-typist “novel”, A Shore Thing. Perhaps this roman a clef could provide loyal viewers of her smoosh-and-puke reality series, Jersey Shore, some valuable insights gossip about the weltanschaung hookups of her Algonquin Round Table STD-Infested Hot Tub companions, Pauly D, J bowWoww, and Mike not “The Situation” Room, the Mr.Darcy of the Abmaster. I have no idea what discourse transpired, but happily there was a Bath & BodyWorks nearby for emergency spray tan needs and, in my case, shower gel.
In related news, Cheney Administration spokesman George W. Bush commented on Snooki’s novel adding “I’ll be about ready to barrel on into that as soon as I finish up My Pet Goat.”
There is really nothing I need to say about the state of American mass culture today. This picture says more than I ever could. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ll just go to the library. You know that place, the Book Museum? It’s where the homeless go to take a dump and poor people still go to rent VHS copies of Die Hard III. At least there I can get WiFi at the attractive price of relative quiet and an effluviance of urban odors.
THIS JUST IN: Snooki to Host White House Correspondents’ Dinner!
Read More Below
- Cool, I'm about to reach 1,000 followers! See the rest of my stats at Twitter Counter: twtr.to/9BZz 1 year ago
- When people tell you to "dream" to make my life better I'd say 99.9% of them have never been beaten and robbed. 2 years ago
- The Comedy Network video intro for our successful pitch to The CRTC youtube.com/qualityshows#p… 2 years ago
- Godbye. qualityshows.wordpress.com 2 years ago
- "They call my home the land of snow' 2 years ago
- IF THIS WERE Y0UR LAST DAY ALIVE WHAT WOULD YOU DO?
- Thanksgiving Night on a Los Angeles Bus
- The Best 6-4-3 I Ever Saw
- This is the Headline You Are Now Reading
- If I Were So Rich…
- Did Rupert Murdoch Hire A Pie Thrower on Craigslist?
- Florida Legalizes Murder, Post-Birth Abortion
- I’m Sure I Speak for Lady Gaga and We Say: Be The Best Possible Version of Yourself.
- The “Tupac of Terror”: Osama Bin Laden Drops Another Joint! New Video
- British Tribal Leaders Expand Gene Pool in Bizarre Mating Ceremony
- Miss Jamaica Keeps ‘Tings Ireal at Miss Universe PageantU
- Pilgrims, Attentive Walmart Shoppers Flock to Graceland for “Shroud of Elvis”
- Pope “Joey Ratz” Responds to Arrest of Pedophile Pedophilia Advisor, Forgives Self, Pedophiles
- This Video’s Lyrics May be Inaccurately Translated for Your Enjoyment
- Leonard Cohen Live: “Closing Time”