Ask Your Doctor Which Side Effect is Right for You
Big Pharma’s Ideal Drug: Treats Nothing, All Side Effects
By Joe Bodolai © 2010, All rights reserved
Drug companies in recent years have continually improved their TTSR — “treatment to side effect ratio” — and poured millions into marketing new conditions, such as last year’s wildly popular “RLS – restless leg syndrome,” which returned millions more. They have finally come up with what they termed their “ideal drug”, one that treats nothing and has only side effects.
“This is a major breakthrough,” gushed Puppy Piper, head of marketing for Restless Leg Syndrome, “the list of side effects it creates is a gold mine for all the drugs we already have to treat side effects like infertility, short term memory loss, diarrhea and those goodies. It should create an infinite loop of prescriptions for drugs that create even more side effects. The market is going to look like piranhas on a feeding frenzy. This is great for the economy! What’s good for the drug companies is good for America, or at least for the America that consists of me. We just have to keep side effects from being called ‘front effects’ because… well, maybe we should add a new category. Sorry. I have to make a call…”
The company released a video of their new commercial, scheduled to launch later this month. I think. I have short term memory loss from taking it. Along with…. brb…
Read More Below
- Cool, I'm about to reach 1,000 followers! See the rest of my stats at Twitter Counter: twtr.to/9BZz 4 years ago
- When people tell you to "dream" to make my life better I'd say 99.9% of them have never been beaten and robbed. 4 years ago
- The Comedy Network video intro for our successful pitch to The CRTC youtube.com/qualityshows#p… 4 years ago
- Godbye. qualityshows.wordpress.com 4 years ago
- "They call my home the land of snow' 4 years ago
- IF THIS WERE Y0UR LAST DAY ALIVE WHAT WOULD YOU DO?
- Thanksgiving Night on a Los Angeles Bus
- The Best 6-4-3 I Ever Saw
- This is the Headline You Are Now Reading
- If I Were So Rich…
- Did Rupert Murdoch Hire A Pie Thrower on Craigslist?
- Florida Legalizes Murder, Post-Birth Abortion
- I’m Sure I Speak for Lady Gaga and We Say: Be The Best Possible Version of Yourself.
- The “Tupac of Terror”: Osama Bin Laden Drops Another Joint! New Video
- British Tribal Leaders Expand Gene Pool in Bizarre Mating Ceremony
- Miss Jamaica Keeps ‘Tings Ireal at Miss Universe PageantU
- Pilgrims, Attentive Walmart Shoppers Flock to Graceland for “Shroud of Elvis”
- Pope “Joey Ratz” Responds to Arrest of Pedophile Pedophilia Advisor, Forgives Self, Pedophiles
- This Video’s Lyrics May be Inaccurately Translated for Your Enjoyment
- Leonard Cohen Live: “Closing Time”